The Amma Experience: Up Close and Personal With the ‘Hugging Saint’

“Serving the world with love and cooperation, you will find your own true Self. As you help those in need, selfishness will fall away, and without even noticing you will find your own fulfillment.”
- Amma

Mata Amritanandamayi Devi - aka Amma, the ‘hugging saint’ - is currently in the US on her 2008 world tour. Since 1981 she has been giving hugs, inspiration and spiritual guidance to people around the world, and is estimated to have hugged more than 30 million to date. Tens of thousands line up for her ‘darshan’ (Sanskrit for divine sight, or blessing) wherever she travels. On her recent visit to Los Angeles, I decided to investigate this phenomenon, and figure out what it is exactly that draws so many millions to share the ‘Amma experience.’

I first met Amma in June of 2006, just two days after my sister’s death in a tragic car accident on the afternoon before her planned visit to see the hugging saint. The idea of wading through thousands of people to see the renowned saint-figure had always kept me away, but this time I felt a divine mandate to go and meet her myself, and share with her the awful news of what had happened to my sister, Ananda, who was a longtime Amma devotee.

That evening was my first time seeing Amma (and the only time again until this year). When I finally got to the front of the room, I was in a daze. I remember telling her what had happened…she was so genuinely shocked with dismay at the news, looking at Ananda’s photo with real love and recognition, staying with me for a seeming eternity, kissing the picture and pressing it to her forehead. It was a small consolation, but it felt like I had completed a small mission for my beloved sister. The rest is a blur….

Flash forward two years later to June 20, 2008, the second anniversary of my sister’s passing, when Amma is scheduled to do her special ‘Devi Bhava’ celebration (it’s a big deal among the Amma crowd). They’re expecting close to 9,000 attendees and the festivities are scheduled from seven at night to way past dawn. I’m told there’s a minor controversy stirring, as the Los Angeles Airport Hilton workers are embroiled in a long-time strike and labor dispute with the hotel, but no matter - this time I’m ready for the full ‘Amma experience.’

I arrive early to get a low-numbered set of ‘darshan tokens’ - alphanumerically stamped hug tickets - for myself, and some family members who are scheduled to come a bit later. It’s 4:30pm and the Hilton is abuzz with excitement and energy. Throngs of arriving crowds are funneled to a holding room to await the magic hour when we’ll be escorted to the ballroom to receive our numbered tokens, and attend a special ‘Atma Puja’ water blessing and soul-purification ceremony.

There is a sweet carnival-like atmosphere of anticipation and joyfulness, as trays of sweet chai tea and homemade mango lassi, the Indian yogurt drink, are passed around, while periodic announcements are made from various members of the diligent group of volunteers. When we’re finally escorted to the main ballroom in long jostling rows, I am rewarded with a set of K3 and K4 numbered tokens - the tickets are dispensed chronologically and apparently numbered from A1 to Z5 - as we’re swiftly led to our designated places on the floor, marked by neatly-lined rows of mysterious small plastic container lids and white donation envelopes.

The whole process is executed with astounding precision and grace, as if Amma’s invisible hands are guiding the whole operation. The ceremony begins, and bowls of water are placed before her as she blesses them one by one. We listen to a lively discourse in her native Malayalam tongue, translated in impossibly long sections by a swami who seems to remember everything she says with astounding accuracy, even while conferring with several devotees around him while she speaks. The discourse is punctuated with humor and wisdom, as she advises us to love and serve, and to enter whole-heartedly into our spiritual practice through conscious action.

She tells the story of a monkey in a temple who admires the great monks who sit for hours fasting and meditating each day, and who decides to do the same so he can also attain enlightenment. On the day he chooses to begin, he sits under a fruit tree so he will be able to eat the luscious fruit as soon as he’s done for the day. Before he can start his meditation, though, his mind is plagued by the idea that he might faint before he is able to eat the sweet fruit, so he moves up to a branch that is filled with fruits. Eventually, he ends up picking the fruits and holding them in his hands; so afraid is he of losing consciousness before he’s able to enjoy the delicious fruits. Inevitably, the monkey is unable to resist the temptation and consumes the fruits, putting off his practice until the next day….

Although the discourse is excellent, it soon becomes clear that the true strength of Amma’s teaching is not conveyed so much through her words, but by her great presence, and by the simple truth of her living example. As the talk ends, we all stand together and chant for the ceremony, while the palpable energy of bliss continues flowing through the hall in waves. Afterwards the water is poured into small plastic cups and passed on trays down the rows. We are told to save this water - hence the mysterious lids - and share it with our friends and families in small drops, using it to heal any ailments we may have. The water has a distinct fullness and healing energy that one can almost taste. It’s not just any old holy water….

The massive crowds are streaming in and out of the ballroom, as the first ticket holders begin to line up for ‘darshan,’ while people wander the halls and peruse the extensive gift-store tables. By now I’m really beginning to warm up to the Amma experience. Where previously I might have shunned the idea of Amma-branded water bottles, t-shirts, photos, Indian jewelry, clothing and curios, I’m now just enjoying the flow, floating along in blissful awareness. The throngs of people and sheer mayhem I expected are replaced by a powerful inner calmness and well being, a sense of stillness in the eye of the storm.

As the evening unfolds, I am captured by the inexplicable spell of this tireless saint-like being. Scents of delicious Indian food waft from the cafeteria, where people sit to watch a live video stream from the stage where she receives her countless visitors. I am entranced by a blissful sense of hope and joyfulness, and smitten with great respect for this sweet and humble woman who greets each new person with the delight of a mother greeting her long-lost children, and whose strength and spirit reach far beyond her physical body.

It’s not until I get to meet her that the full experience rubs in, though. For a hardheaded spiritual cynic like myself, it’s easy to dismiss the whole melee of devoted crowds as religious fervor or blind devotion, until you get to the moment itself….

I’m finally in line together with my mother and my other sister - we’ve decided to attend the evening together as an homage to my sister Ananda - and we’ve brought a small bouquet of flowers and some apples to present to her (traditional offerings to the guru). As we get closer to the front, a sweet perfume is in the air as the fans are blowing, and the anticipation mounts. An indescribable sweetness pervades the atmosphere, a palpable energy of love and beauty that surrounds everything, as one-by-one she embraces each person and murmurs sweet words in their ears. Everyone gets a hug and some are kissed on the forehead or cheek, as she throws handfuls of rose petals and dispenses Hershey’s kisses.

When we finally arrive at the front I hand her an apple, and my favorite picture of Ananda with a cow she befriended in Rishikesh, India. She looks knowingly at the picture and gives it a big kiss, passing it quickly to an attendant. For a moment she seems to be speaking with the attendant about my sister, but then suddenly I’m swept into her deep embrace…for that endless moment the world stands still and I’m silently enraptured in grace, clasped like a child in her bosom as she chants gently in my ear a sacred mantra of devotion to the divine mother spirit. Then quickly as it all began, I’m peeled off in a daze by the attendant, and set in place for a group hug together with mom and sis. It’s not long before we’re sent off again on our slightly bewildered merry way….

For the rest of the evening I watch Amma share her blessings with the endless crowds, released in to the flow, and absorbed into the space of blissful presence that’s shared by so many there. One after another, the people come away crying, dazed, or blissfully stumbling away with half-smiles on their faces…. It’s easy to recognize the countenances of the people released from her embrace, left to descend dizzily from the platform and back into the crowd. She’s clearly working at levels that reach far beyond the physical senses, and my intuition tells me that her essence has pervaded a deep energetic field in me that’s fundamentally shifted my entire outlook.

Something inexplicable happened that evening. The unconditional love and joy that was pouring out from this saint-like being had transformed my entire energy field. It was as if my energetic poles had shifted, and my typical human instincts of self-preservation had been transmuted into an intense desire to share and serve, to give this love back to the rest of the world. It’s clearer to me now than ever that in giving love selflessly, a vacuum is created for more love to be received and shared in exponential waves.

I can’t say if it was Amma who did it, or just a spontaneous kinetic reaction to the ‘Amma experience,’ but ever since that night I’ve been rooted and anchored by a deep sense of blissful knowing that even though my mind may tell me otherwise from time to time, I know that I am truly taken care of, and everything is in divine order. I think my sister would agree.

May you be blessed with great love and overflowing grace in all that you do, may you be blessed by Amma’s presence, and as they say in India, ‘Jai Ma!’ - victory to the divine mother spirit in all.

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For more information: visit Amma’s website

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